I’m
on SSDI for the past 5 years and don’t work. . . . I
devote about 20 hours a week volunteering with 2 groups that advocate for
and work to [deleted for confidentiality], and do grassroots organizing.
I also volunteer with . . . a group devoted to promoting non-violent
dispute resolution; the peace/anti-war movement. Two weeks ago, my psychologist
(PhD) abruptly terminated my therapy with her, telling me at what I thought
was to be a regular session that she was terminating immediately. I
. . . have seen her for about 13 . . .
years. . . . The only explanation given to me re: the reason
for termination was that she “couldn’t remain objective” in
treating me. She spoke of consulting colleagues (incl.. my psychiatrist),
and someone with APA ethics. . . . The specific details of
my situation are very, very complex and not easily
summarized. . . . I am baffled about what is going on here.
I think I’m due a more expansive explanation. . . . It
feels so adversarial to me. . . . My faith in the mental health
field is gone. I plan on . . . dropping my psychiatrist, stopping
my meds, not finding a new therapist. . . . How can this happen
this way? Sorry for being so long-winded. I’m in quite bad straits over
this issue. Violated, abandoned, confused, angry....terminated.
Let’s begin with the end of your message. “How
can this happen this way? . . . Violated, abandoned, confused,
angry....terminated.” These are profound feelings. And right in the
midst of such feelings is the place where psychotherapy should begin, not
end.
For most
persons, such feelings begin in childhood. And it could be that some form
of childhood abuse affected you as well—something irrational and baffling,
something that left you feeling, well, violated, abandoned, confused, and
angry. And most persons—lacking proper
psychotherapy—try to deal with emotions such as these by driving them
out of conscious awareness through various psychological
defense mechanisms.
For example, in your circumstances your wanting to research
“termination” is a form of intellectualism. And, like it
or not, even social
activism is more often than not a psychological defense to get political
satisfaction for
unconscious emotional
hurt. Consciously, you want to end war, and yet unconsciously you are at
war with the entire world.
So, if you’re
still reading and not fuming at me, I can say that, from what you have described,
your psychotherapist has handled the case ethically. Something came up between
the two of you that she couldn’t handle objectively, she sought outside
consultation, and it was decided that
termination was
the best recourse. So take it as a blessing. Instead of turning your anger
against yourself by stopping
medications and feeling
victimized by
psychotherapy, recognize that feeling “violated, abandoned, confused,
angry, and terminated” is the very emotional core of your psychotherapeutic
work that, in spite of 13 years of treatment, has been missed all
along.
So rather than
try to find political satisfaction for your hurt,
find a competent
psychologist who’s smarter than you are and can see through all your
defenses.
No
advertising—no sponsor—just the simple truth . . .
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